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Parasite of the Week - Great Escapes |
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Written by Seemsfree Corporate Communications
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Friday, 26 September 2008 |
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With a lot going on in the world, there have been too many great parasites out there for us to single out specific individuals or organizations. However, one of our favorite parasite species showed up in our mailbox recently and we felt it necessary to polish up the award. Great Escapes of Lakeland FL - has incredible delusions of grandeur. They apparently love to impersonate the Federal Government. The face of the mailer reads: BUSINESS MAIL - PENALTY FOR TAMPERING; FORM 2008 at the top. Then in a HUGE white on black box in the lower left corner, big enough to scare the shit out of anybody: WARNING
THE PENALTY FOR OBSTRUCTING OR INTERFERING WITH THE DELIVERY OF THIS LETTER IS A FINE OF $2,000 AND UP TO 5 YEARS IMPRISONMENT. We LOVE you guys! You set an example for businessmen EVERYWHERE. Get the suckers to buy into your message, no matter what! |
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Parasite of the Week - Lending CEOs |
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Written by SeemsFree Corporate Communications
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Sunday, 09 March 2008 |
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It's been a while since we've presented the parasite of the week. Either no one seemed deserving for a particular week, or -- more often -- there were too many in one week for us to cover. This week, the newspapers across the country have been filled with articles regarding the CEOs of several lending institutions who cleaned up to the tune of hundreds of millions of dollars in bonuses and stock options while customers went into forclosure and the stock in their institutions fell like goose poop on a new blue Armani suit. These guys get the award this week, and we're sure that there are plenty more just around the corner. Remember the words of Richard (Dick) Brown to his employees in 2002. "NOBODY is worth $54 million a year, but I have to make that kind of money because I have a very expensive wife." Parasites of the Week thought for the day.... The difference between a "rock-star" CEO and a real rock star is that the real rock star has talent! |
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Parasite of the Week - Domain Registry of America |
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Written by SeemsFree Corporate Communications
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Tuesday, 15 May 2007 |
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Wow! It must take really, really good technology to print as small as the printing on the back of the "this notice is not a bill" from Domain Registry of America (approximately 5,000 words... the length of a decent published short story or approximately 20 pages of your average novel manuscript). Simply amazing that the words "Domain Name Expiration Notice" and "Total Amount" are so HUGE in comparison... that along with the bright red, bold "You must provide your e-mail address to complete registration." One of the most interesting notes in the tiny print on the back of this "not a bill" is the statement that DRoA is not responsible to even validate that the domains they want to charge you $50 per year for are even available to be registered to you! They also happily reserve the right to provide your private information to any of their "service partners." For a notice that "is not a bill", it certainly looks like one. Enough to fool 90% of your average overworked accounts payable clerks. SeemsFree applauds DRoA (their acronym, not ours). With more companies like yours we wouldn't have to ever produce anything. |
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